Don't tell me what it's all about

What do you get when you fall in love?
A guy with a pin to burst your bubble
That's what you get for all your trouble.
I'll never fall in love again.
I'll never fall in love again.

There's this lump, stuck in the throat, that refuses to budge. An emptiness inside. A cynic at full throttle, gurgling from within.
Consumerism is good, I argue with my friends, while promoting it towards the growth of Indian economy. But deep inside the recesses of my heart, a Voice echoes, “but consumerism has promoted packaging…..putting things ( of any quality ) into gay and brilliant drapes and fooling people”.
Me : “But what’s wrong with presenting things nicely?”
Voice : “Nothing. It’s just that packaging often takes the consumer’s mind off from the contents.”
Me : “Well, the consumer has to be careful and conscious!”
Voice : “That’s what I’m telling you! Consumers are lead astray by Packages. Consumers are not matured enough, yet”
Me : “In that case they have to attain maturity by means of trial and error……..simple”
Voice : “Is it so simple really?”
Me : “Yes. Most of the products come with a warranty/guarantee these days.”
Voice : “Most, but not All”
Me : “Those things that are not covered can be changed. You can always buy a new piece”
Voice : “But all things in life are not replaceable. If you are not careful while acquiring them, you may have to do with a faulty or damaged piece all your life”
Me : “Why should I!!! I will surely get a new piece”
Voice : “What about Love?”
Me : “What about Love?!!!!!!”
Voice : “Can you exchange it. Or buy a fresh piece?”
Me : “Ideally you cannot. But these days Love has become rather stale. Moving from hand to hand; rather heart to heart J “
Voice : “Right. A commodity, shall we say?”
Me : “Well, we may”
Voice : “And Love has not escaped the clutches of consumerism, you’ll agree, I suppose?”
Me : “Things have to be in sync, you see. Economy and Humanity run hand-in-hand. One cannot bypass the other.”
Voice : “You are indicating that Love is also controlled by Economy?”
Me : “And why not! Empty pockets are no good breeding grounds for Love. It produces under-nourished crop which cannot survive for longtime purposes”
Voice : “So, Love is not Love that breeds in the fallow lands of heart. The heart has to be cultivated to fertility, which can be achieved through money and consumerism AND packaging”
Me : “Now you are getting the drift of the times, my dear Voice. Packaging is of utmost importance. It can change the taste of the food, the smell of the perfume, the …………”
Voice ( interrupting ) : “……the person you are loving, the heart that would have been otherwise unworthy of your Love”
Me : “(ahem) I hope you are not playing me for a fool?!”
Voice : “ Oh no! Dear me! I’m only appreciating your insight into our current social, and consequently inter-personal, phenomena. Thanks for sharing with me. And I was living in a fool’s paradise, thinking how Love can cure all Ills. And not knowing that actually all Ills cure Love!”
Me : “Oh, you flatter me. You see, one only needs to keep the eyes and ears open.”

What do you get when you fall in love?
You only get lies and pain and sorrow
So for at least until tomorrow
I’ll never fall in love again!!!!!!!!!

My New Experience!!!

Amar latest experience – Nimtolla Maha Shmashaan.
Mrityu khub kach theke,in fact barir bhetore theke dekhechi. Kintu Shmashaan ei prothom darshan holo jibone.

Onek golpo shunechilam agey, shmashaan niye. Ei ekta abhigyata dekhechi loke besh gambhirjer shonge, athacha tariye-tariye bole thake. Mane jahir korte chai je shey jiboner ek abhinna anga ke dekheche. Bojhate chai je shey jibon ke ultimately bujhte pereche.

Shey ek besh jayga. Amar Maa’r oboshyo ichhe chilo na je ami jai, kintu shesh-mesh ek mesho maa ke bojhalen je “or to life er practical jinish gulo dekha uchit”. Ta ami onar kache kritogyo thakbo.
Khulei boli. Amar dida mara gelen. Prochondo ekta active life lead korar porey, besh 7-8 mash bhuge ebong shojja-shayee theke, obosheshe tini biday nilen. Ek Monday morning blue laden mon niye office jachhi, emon shomoy khobor elo je uni ar nei. Kajei office er kachh thekei gari ghurie ghotona-sthole pouchute holo. Prochondo ekta uneasy feeling hochhilo. Bhaggish Saturday te dida r kache gechilam. Noile to ar dekhtei partam na! God is there. He makes sure that everything happens in good time.

Let me come back to the actual point I want to make. Or is there a point at all? I don’t know. Let me proceed…
All relevant people were informed. And almost everyone came down to pay my dida a last visit. I guess her PR skills are to be praised!

Amar dida khub organized chilen. Agey thekei janiye rekhechilen je onake jeno Nimtolla’y niye jaw ahoy ( jehetu amar dadu keo okhanei niye jawa hoechilo- 29 years back). And that she should make her final earthly travel in one of those modern glass hearses. So Be It! Etao ekta dekhar bishoy chilo, je sheba shangasthan theke amra gari bhara korlam, tader kormi der utshaho. After all this is their bread n butter! Etao ekta profession! Agekar diney paray kichu “faltu” chele thakto, jara ar kono kaje lagto na, tara erom parapokar kore thakto. Ekhun shetai ekta organized professional service e rupantorito hoeche!

Jai hok- shmashaan jayga’tar kothay ashi. Shey ek jayga – Ganga’r dhare, purono Kolkatay. Ekta not-so-chowra rasta, jar du dhare dokaner line- cha’er dokan, pujor jinish er dokan,ityadi. Shob theke interesting, dokan guloy ganja’r kolke thore-thore shajano!!!! Baba Bhootnath er mondir tao besh laglo. Shey din ta Srabon masher shesh shombar chilo, tai shob chele-meye ra Baba Taraknath’er ( ba onno je kono shib thakurer) mathay jol dhalbar jonne okhankar dokan thekei banke kolshi boshiye, ganga theke jol bhore paye hete rowna dichilo. Aro ekta odbhut drishyo dekhlam. Ek mohila dondi kete rasta diye jachhilen ar tar shonge besh boro ekta group uthshaho dite-dite jachilo.

Amar Maa’r kora nirdesh chilo amar cousin ke “shon, o jeno eka kothao na jay. Or shonge-shonge thakbi.Shmashane nana-rokom lok thake!” – tai amar bon r ami almost sharakkhon haat dhore ghurlam. Shudhu tai noy, onnoder pechone theke guard o dilam!
Dida ke niye diye giye electric chulli’r shamne mati’te ,ekta bansher frame er opore rakha holo. Tarpor jotha-bidhi pujo holo ebong amra opekkha korte laglam shomoy’er. Tar I modhye abar ek jhamela – dom er prapyo taka. Sheta niye’o dor korte holo! Oder kache amra customer. Ora daam hakbe uchu dor’e, ar amra sheta ke ekta reasonable rate e anar cheshta korbo – etai niyom! Fortunately, amder line dite hoyni ( o yes, ekhaneo queue system ache). But amader por-por I onek gulo body eshe gelo. Tader modhye ekjon der kanna dekhe amar mone holo era bodhoy hindi-bangla cinema dekhe practice kore esheche. Amar udyeshyo tader emotions ke aghaat kora noy. Kintu kanna’r shonge tara je dialogue dichilo, tate ami erom na bhebe thakte parlam na. Amake khoma korben.

Ek shomoy amader bola holo je ei baar ashol kaj hobe. Dida ke chulli’r dike niye jabe, emon shomoy hothat dekhlam kotha theke ek gada chele-chokra’r ekta dol eshe hajir hoe gelo. Eder ke etokkhon kotthao dekhini. Tader ke bhed kore chulli ta dekha’I amar kache ekta challenge hoe daralo. Yes,amar besh interest chilo chulli ta dekha’r. Kono idea chilo na amar byapar ta kemon hobe.
Chulli te time lagey 45 minutes. So went to have tea and biscuits to kill the time. Ami ar okhanei biscuit khete parlam na – khanik’ta unhygienic bhebe, ar khanik’ta ichhe korchilo na khete.
Shob shesh hole, Ganga’y asthi bishorjon diye shurjasto dekhlam. Drishya’ta khub mon chhuye gelo.

Apnara hoyto bhabchen je shmashane giye ami eto objectively ei shob ki kore notice korlam. Especially jokhon amar nijer Dida chole gelen. But the point is that, okhane jawar minute khaneker modhyei amar modhye shmashaan boiraggyo eshe giyechilo. Amar khali mone holo “ei khanei tahole ashte hobe.”.Full-stop. Er modhye kono argument er jayga nei. Kono choice nei. Kono size nei. Kono discount nei. Kono options nei. Kono exchange offer nei.

Itsy-Bitsy-Pet

Kukur-chhana, kukur-chhana kothay tui geli
Kukur-chana, kukur-chana amar bari eli...

A sudden streak of creativity in composition brutally thwarted by the only other inhabitant of my home........my Maa!
“ Again you have started off about the puppy! If you bring one, make sure it travels with you, wherever you go….be it office or vacation”.
Alas, unlike many organizations in the occidental world, Indian companies can barely give place for their employees to sit. Never mind the pets!

But what is all the fuss about keeping a pet? Why doesn’t a parent understand that a pet can play a vital role in bringing up a healthy and mentally fit human being!

It is a tested and proven fact that children who grow up with pets are more sensitive towards their behaviour with other living creatures, including fellow human beings! It actually helps a child to develop his/her social skills. It is an aid to building up their self-confidence, non-verbal communication, compassion and empathy.

Sometimes a child (like me) tends to become lazy and inactive. Having a pet can induce the same child into physical activity.

A single child is very common these days. In such cases also, having a pet of their own instill feelings of brotherhood, love, loyalty and affection in them. What they miss in terms of a brother or a sister, can majorly be polished over in the form of a pet! Having a dog or cat, taking care of it on their own, also tantamount to building a sense of responsibility and ownership among children. After all these children grow up to be men and women who make up the society. So if as a child you lack basic brotherhood qualities, how can we be expected to become responsible adults!!!

As far as I am concerned, personally, I feel that having a pet is as essential as going to school of studies or getting coached for music or martial arts. It’s a pity that my mother feels otherwise. In fact, she herself could have reaped the benefit of taking care of a pet –going on walks with her pet could have helped her to a great extent to beat her high blood pressure and blood sugar, besides keeping her company when she is all alone at home!

May be another day, another time, another life – parents/family members would ultimately realize the importance of having a pet in the family.

And talking about pets – I am not only talking about keeping exotic or foreign breeds. Think of all the homeless and hapless puppies and kittens on our streets – many of whom encounter untimely death due to lack of proper nourishment or road accidents. So don’t just talk about being “soft hearted” or “compassionate” – take a real step towards it – the street animals need us.

Ekti binidro rajani

Kaal shara raat load-shedding chilo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kono maney hoy?????????
Sharadin gelo, shara shondhye gelo……….think manushe shute jachhe, shei shomoy power-cut.
Besh khushi hoe uthlam jokhon chollish minute pore power eshe gelo………..kintu hay, shey shudhui bhuo asha. Tokhono WBSEB tar ashol uddyeshyo lukiye rekehchilo. Thik jemon golaap tar fool tai dekhei, kaanta noy.
Ar etai promanito holo jokhon - ( ami thik shomoy ta jani na coz ghori dekhini ) tobe andaaj 1am nagaad abar fan er hawa bondho hoe gelo abong ami realize korlam je abar power off hoe geche. Little did I know je this time it was for good.
To add to the woe of being power-less in a summer’s night, the weather was as grim as it could be. Ekta gacher ekta pata’o norchilo na – just bhebe dekhun bondhugon!!! Thhom-thhom korchilo akash, no hawa, no batash – mon ta amar hoe gelo bilkul hotash L
Tobe hyan, bhagwaan ke ghar me der hai, par andher nahin – no mosquitoes!!!! Ki Ashchorjjo!!!!! Ektao mosha chilo na, ektao mosha kamralo na. Kaner pashe ektao mosha bhon-bhon korlo na!!! kirom ekta odbhut kritogyota bodh holo amar – kar proti, ami tokhon thik realize korte parini. Ekhun bhabchi – bhogobaan na mosha – who should I be indebted to???? Ek kaj kori, ami dujon kei pronaam janai. Je kalker durbishoho raat ta ke ektu holeo ujjwal kore tolar jonne.
Raat egiye chollo tuk-tuk kore. Amio adha-ghum ebong adho-jagorone’er ek dolachole ghire roilum – kokhon gheme-neye, abar kokhon shojaag jege.

Sheshe alo fut te shuru korlo, pakhi rao eke-eke jege uthlo, akash ektu-ektu kore forsha hote laglo, ar ami shei shob drishya ebong shonbo ke anubhab korte thaklam ja aj obdhi amar ojana ochena chilo.Shesh’e ar thakte na pere janla gulo shotaan khule dilam raat 4 ter shomoy. Kintu nah, bhorer hawa bole je ekta bostu ghora-fera korar kotha, tar kono pattai pelam na L
Ogottya shei jegei shue roilam. Oi shomoye ar parchilam na. Shorir er shob shokti furiye esheche raatri jagoroner fole. Chokh chaiche pran-pon gobhir ghum e mogno hote, kintu uttapta deho – fan na ghorar jonne- takey allow korche na.Emon shomoy hothat!!!!!!! – fan ghurlo, hawa dilo, abaaaarrrrrrrr shob nishchup. Ghotona ta du-bar repeat holo. Arthaat du bar khoniker jonne power esheo chole gelo abar.
7AM e finally jokhon power on holo, tokhon na ache ghumonor time, na ache mood. Ei bhabei glanite, dukkhe, koshte katlo ekti binidro rajani!!!!!!!!!

Brishti pore Tapur-Tupur...

Ki gorom – ki gorom………pran’ta jay-jay pray
Obosheshe, elo desh’e, akash hote obiram dharay
Shei shudha jar jonne shorir-mon chilo opekkhay
Aj brishti mon bhejalo, bhijlo boshon, tanu-mon.

Aj mon shudhu tomake kache chay
Brishti jokhon mon ta ke dhoyay
Pashe jodi tumi nao thako, tobu theko amar moner anginay
Haat’ta amar jodi nao dhoro, chhnue jeo mon’ta.

Hoyto tumi bhabcho na amar kotha temon kore ekhun
Je bhabe ami anubhab korchi tomay
Hoyto tomar moner alo-chhayay ami nei kothao
Tobe amar moner, alo o chhaya – dutoi tumi.

Jodi konodin, kokhono, emon ek badol mukhar shondhay
Tumi thako amar pashe,
Tobe moner kotha bolbo ami, shob bhule
Ar dekhbo, alo-chhaya’r khela, tomar mukhe’r ashe-pashe.

Dol dol duluni,Bor ashbe ekhuni

“Ei shon, porshu bikele ora toke dekhte ashbe”, office theke firtei maa bollen……..Shanghatik ekta sentence, jeta tomar jibon take puro-puri olot-palot kore rekhe debe. Tumi obaak hobe, sheta muhurter modhye panic e bodle jabe, jeta khub shiggiri birokti te porinoto hobe, ebong shob sheshe mukher bhetore ekta bhalo-na-laga taste.

Tomra nishchoi bujhecho etokkhone je ami kisher kotha bolchi. Hyan, biyer kotha. Ekta bishuddho Bangali motey’r arranged marriage. Er theke kono chharan-chhoron nei. Biye to kortei hobe. Tao chele hole na hoy mane chilo, biye na korleo chole. Kintu ekti bhodro-barir tanaya o-bibahito theke ajibon norok-jontrona o shomaaj’er bibhinno bipod-apod er shommukheen hobe, ta ki kore hoy!!! Meye’tar baba-maa je Shwarge giyeo shanti paben na!!! Ta hok na meye professionally qualified, MNC te chakurirota, othoba nijer cheshtay, nijer paye darano. Ekta meye’r jibone chakri kokhonoi pradhanyo pete pare na. Chele hole na hoy onno kotha chilo. Amar didi’ma pray’i bole thaken “byata chele sonar chaand khabe dudher shor,meye-chele mati’r dhela jabe porer ghor”. Shey kotha alada je dudher shor khete motei bhalo lage na amar, ba amar dada’r.

Ar arranged marriage! Amar ek mashtuto bon bolechilo ekbar, “college life e time ta constructive bhabe katale,ekhun eto jhamela hoto na”. Kintu ki ar kora, amader college e pod’er chele kom’I chilo. Ontoto amar chokhe to poreni. Tarpor post graduation, chakri – hoy amar takey pochondo hoyni, noy tar amake opochondo! Ei tana poren’e kete gelo koto-gulo bochor. Jiboner durmulyo basanta’r kichu bochor. Koto chatting, koto dating,bondhu’der through diye alaap – kintu na, bhobi bholar noy.

Ogotya ei lekhar prothom line’er srishti. – ora dekhte ashbe. Heshe dekhao, hete dekhao, boshe dekhao, bole dekhao, chokher drishti’te dekhao, hater bhongima’te dekhao. Ajkal abar hater kaj , gaan geye dekhanor jug chole geche. Je khabar gulo dekhne’wala’der poribeshon kora hoeche, sheta meye’r hater toiri kina, erom proshno to bhabai gorhito kaj. Eishob lokeder “insensitive” bole chihnito kora hoye thake. Etao ek obak kando je meye dekhte eshe cheler baba o maa shob shomoy asha koren je meye nishchoi randhan korme potiyoshi. Bhule jay je meye’ti’o tader chele’r moto’I ador-jotne lalito-palito. Tar baba-ma’o takey lekha-pora shikhiye manush korechen. Tar o ekti individuality ache. Takey tar maa temon’i jotno kore ranna kore khaiyechen, jotota chele’r maa. Kintu manob choritro boroi odbhut ebong jotil. Tai jokhon maa bollen je amay dekhte ashbe, ami thik I kore nilam je best policy holo keep the conversation simple and to the point.

Ebar dekhte eshe ki holo-na-holo, that is another story altogether. But ekhane we are only concerned with marriage – process of arranged marriage.

Prem jokhon korte paroni, bachha, tokhon meye dekhte to ashbei tomake. Proshno korbei. Jobab ta mono-moto na holei bipod. Maa bolben, chakri-bakri koro, ekta proshner intelligent uttar’o dite paro na! As if chakri kori bole ami shadharon ekta bhoy-pawa( dekhte esheche bole ) meye’r cheye alada. As if office e amader biyer interview’er training deoa hoy! Bojho byapar!!!

Chele jodi baba-maa’r shonge elo to bhalo. Noile abar tara bolben “amra to dekhlam,kintu bujhtei parchen, chele’r pochondo’i main”. Arre baba, tai jodi hoy to chele’ke niye elen na keno? Jar mot’ta important tar’i to asha uchit, naki?

On the whole, amar mone hoy,it is grossly unfair to blame any failure of this process on the girl. Taar motamot ebong preferences er upor shob cheye beshi nojor rakha uchit. Chele’r pochondo holei meye ke hyan bolte hobe, eta kono kotha noy. Meye’r pochondo hoeche kina, that is of utmost importance.

Tobe bondhugon, amar ei shob kotha shune bhebo na je amar barir lok dictatorship chalay amar opor. Onara besh liberal, ei ekta bishoye. Oboshyo amio besh tiara meye. Kono kothai shoja-shuji manyo kora amar dhatei shoy na :-) And I totally respect my family for respecting my likes and dislike in this arranged-marriage byapar.

But jai bolo,biye byapar ta kintu khub ekta kharap noy.Ar keu dekhte eshe ek chance'e pochondo korleo besh bhaloi lage :-D Ar hyan,love-marriage der bolbo,arranged marriage e besh ekta buk dhuk-puk kora bhalo laga joriye ache kintu.Ektu traditional,ektu formal,kintu ei realization je relationship ta prem'eri,er modhye ekta alada romancho'kor byapar ache.

Jani, khub joga-khichuri bhashay likhlam ei lekha’ta. But that’s how I am, bhashay jokhon bhebechi, shei bhasha tei likhechi. Kajei eta amar nijer mon’er lekha. Not influenced by any external forces of decorum.

Jai hok, mohila-pathok’ra, ebong purush-pathok’ra, tomader shobai kei welcome korchi to put in any comments on this you wish to.

Nomoshkaar!!!

Shubho Nabo Barsho 1416………..Agami bochhor bhalo katuk…….shukhe shochhonde thako………….ei kal’kei hoe gelo poila boishakh. Baap re, koto shuvechha je pelam. Jara shara bochor kothai bole na amar shonge, tara’o wish korlo! Badhyo hoe amakeo proti-shuvechha janate holo( khub je ichhe korchilo, ta noy motei, kintu bhodro’ta)! Amra bhodro Bangali. Shara bochor jader ke shaap-shaapanto kori, poila boishakhe kintu shobai amar shuvechha’r joggyo, ebong amio tader shuvechha hashi-hashi mukhe grohon kori.

Lok’e bole Bangali hujug’er jaat. Din din utsab er shonkhya ar hujjoti berei choleche. Hote pare. Kintu etao to bhebe dekho, je ei recession er bajare, Bangali’i kintu World economy te maximum contribution kore choleche. Shei ingriji nobo barshe cake-pastry ar ingriji shura’r fowara diye shuru hoeche......guti-guti paye egiye eshe poila boishakh’er jama-kapor, khawa-dawa, ghora-fera,ityadi,ityadi.

Ei je, kal ke amar maa mishti’r dokane giye,bela matro dosh’tay dekhlen je dokane ek tray laddu chara shob mishti bhno-bhna, bhabun to, mishti prostut-korta ebong bikreta der to ar recession cholche na. Tahole ki kore boli je recession shara biswa ke aghaat heneche? Moyra’ra to besh shnashe-jole’i achen! Ar mishti’r dokaner machhi’gulo! Ore babba, size’e din-din bere cholechhe. Ar amra manush’rao tar shonge palla dichhi(ami nije jolo-jyanto udahoron) – Christmas, English New Year, Valentine’s Day, Holi, Bangla Nabo Barsho, Father’s day, Mother’s day, Women’s day, Family day – ufffffff, gift je bilobar jinish, ta ei “day” gulo dekhei bojha jay. Ar temni byang’er chhata’r moto gift shop matha chara diye uthche. Tobe shotti kotha bolte ki amar besh bhaloi lagto gift pete, jodi keu dito. Kintu apnara etao bolte paren je ami hingshute, nije pai na bole shobai ke hingshe kore ei shob baje baje kotha likhchi. Tobe on a serious note, amar mone hoy, ei commercialization of emotions e ar jai hok na keno, prochur loker anna-shangsthan hoy. Kutir shilpa barche, sales barche, dokaan khulche, shei dokkane notun manob-shompod lagche, ar employment barche. Kajei bhebe dekhle, shob jinish er moto ei shob pal-parboner’o ekta positive side to nishchoi ache. Ei je maa amake nono Barsho upalakkhe Colours of India theke ekta chikan er kurta kine dilo, that was actually promoting hand-craft.

Jak ge, ki kotha theke kishe chole elam!! Shadhe bole, kothay kotha bare….ei jonnie parotpokkhe ami mukh khulina. Ar mukh kholar nomuna, bondhura, dekhtei pachho tomra!

Amar boktobyo holo, jotoi amra shilpa ke egiye niye jawar cheshta kori, totoi amader pocket gorer-maath hoe jay. Eta ekta vicious cycle. Ar shob cheye ashchorjjo holo ei je, shob jene-shune’o amra ei path’e paa barate badhyo hoi. Jeno ke ekta jor kore tene niye jay amake dokaan’gulor dike. Ar tar opore promotions-sms’e, email’e, mailers pathiye, leaflets & pamphlets…..ufffff……..there’s no end to it!!!

Ei re, kichutei point e kotha bolchi na.

Mot kotha, Poila Boishakh bangali’r onnyotomo anonder din. Ei din amra nutan jama pori, gurujon der paye haat diye aashirbaad ni ebong chotoder aashirbaad kori. Amra aatmiyo shajan der bari jai, Rabindrasangeet shuni, probhaat feri’r gaan shuni. Shondesh,rosogolla, misti doi, ebong bibhinno bangali ranna diye bhuribhoj kori. Bangali’r shaj-poshaak pore berate beroi bikeler fur-fure hawa’te. Ebong ei bhabei amra amader sholo ana bangaliana ke bojay rathte shokkhom hoechi.
Nomoshkaar.